When I was little love meant Prince Charming sweeping in on his gallant horse, everything would be perfect and I would live happily ever after….Disney has a whole lot to answer for.
Prince Charming doesn’t exist and to be perfectly honest if he did I’d be bored in a week. Who wants the perfect guy. I am so far from perfect you would have to squint and run back a few steps to see any kind of Disney princess. Even then my hair would still defy gravity in the morning….
Lust is easy, love not so much. Realising the difference, now that’s a skill worth developing. I’ve been in love once. It hurt like hell but I wouldn’t take back a single second. It made me stronger, showed me my limits and gave me a glimpse of just how amazing life can be if you let go of the barriers and learn to move with the crazy beat.
Disney tells you they lived happily ever after, it conveniently omits the ridiculous fights, petty comments and the stubborn refusal to admit your wrong in a quest to be right.
It doesn’t quite capture the feeling of safety that overcomes you as you’re enveloped in their arms, the way your world can slow down and right itself, restoring your sense of balance from just lying with them and talking about nothing in particular, surrounded by the blanket of dark.
The best love stories show us what it is to fight for the person who has your heart, the real ones show you that sometimes you need to summon the courage to let go. To realise that life doesn’t always accommodate the quickening of your heartbeat.
I refuse to love in order to be loved. I don’t need more people in my life. I have the most incredible friends who are more than willing to support me/read me the riot act and tough love my ass..whichever is required. My family may on occasion make me want to chew my own arm off but they are always always there no matter how many times I decide on a whim to change college course.
I’ve felt the unrelenting dull ache of heartbreak. I’ve experienced the dizzy feeling of falling. I’ve laughed until I cried and cried until I had to laugh and it’s worth it. If the right person comes along it’s worth every jumble of feelings that follows.
Prince Charming can keep on riding, because the one who can tug out a smile when I’m intent on being in a mood and is there for no other reason other than there’s nowhere else they would rather be, that person won’t need a flashy horse anyway.
I am happy, deliciously so. I don’t need someone to complete me. That doesn’t mean I’ll make the person who makes me want to smile when I’m tired and cranky lurk in the shadows.
Life is for living and I hope love never lets me forget that.