Heartbeats

December 22, 2012 — 13 Comments

When I was little love meant Prince Charming sweeping in on his gallant horse, everything would be perfect and I would live happily ever after….Disney has a whole lot to answer for.

Prince Charming doesn’t exist and to be perfectly honest if he did I’d be bored in a week. Who wants the perfect guy. I am so far from perfect you would have to squint and run back a few steps to see any kind of Disney princess. Even then my hair would still defy gravity in the morning….

Lust is easy, love not so much. Realising the difference, now that’s a skill worth developing. I’ve been in love once. It hurt like hell but I wouldn’t take back a single second. It made me stronger, showed me my limits and gave me a glimpse of just how amazing life can be if you let go of the barriers and learn to move with the crazy beat.

Disney tells you they lived happily ever after, it conveniently omits the ridiculous fights, petty comments and the stubborn refusal to admit your wrong in a quest to be right.

It doesn’t quite capture the feeling of safety that overcomes you as you’re enveloped in their arms, the way your world can slow down and right itself, restoring your sense of balance from just lying with them and talking about nothing in particular, surrounded by the blanket of dark.

The best love stories show us what it is to fight for the person who has your heart, the real ones show you that sometimes you need to summon the courage to let go. To realise that life doesn’t always accommodate the quickening of your heartbeat.

I refuse to love in order to be loved. I don’t need more people in my life. I have the most incredible friends who are more than willing to support me/read me the riot act and tough love my ass..whichever is required. My family may on occasion make me want to chew my own arm off but they are always always there no matter how many times I decide on a whim to change college course.

I’ve felt the unrelenting dull ache of heartbreak. I’ve experienced the dizzy feeling of falling. I’ve laughed until I cried and cried until I had to laugh and it’s worth it. If the right person comes along it’s worth every jumble of feelings that follows.

Prince Charming can keep on riding, because the one who can tug out a smile when I’m intent on being in a mood and is there for no other reason other than there’s nowhere else they would rather be, that person won’t need a flashy horse anyway.

I am happy, deliciously so. I don’t need someone to complete me. That doesn’t mean I’ll make the person who makes me want to smile when I’m tired and cranky lurk in the shadows.

Life is for living and I hope love never lets me forget that.

13 responses to Heartbeats

  1. 

    Spot on. Fairy tales tell nothing of how one must maintain a relationship over the years. So many people think you can just neglect it and if you are meant to be everything will work itself out. That’s nonsense! It takes team work and dedication to keep a relationship on track, especially for the long haul, no matter how ‘in love’ you are.

  2. 

    Yup. The fairy tales never tell you about the times that Prince Charming left the seat up, or the time He took the white horse and left her on the side of the magical unicorn patch because she kept hogging all their minutes 😉 lol

    Love is when you KNOW that even when you’re mad, you’ll come back. Love is when he/she sees you “soul naked” and you don’t mind, because you trust each other with your deepest selves. That’s a very VERY rare thing, but once you find it, don’t let it go, or worse yet, Fug it up 😛

    Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and/or KwanzaChrismikhah, whatever applies! 🙂

  3. 

    Love hurts, just like the truth.

  4. 

    I love this post! It’s very thoughtful, deep, honest, and inspiring. You are totally right, it is okay to live a life surrounded by people you love, even if you don’t have the love of your life just yet. And when you do finally meet them, it’ll be a roller coaster of those beautiful imperfections. Props to you for not having those unrealistic expectations… reality is far better! 🙂

  5. 

    Good writing. In these more modern times the princes horse does not fit into the elevator.

  6. 

    Prince Charming does sound fairly boring, I agree with that! There has to be passion and sometimes even a little bit of conflict so you can either confirm that your relationship is worth keeping in tact with team work, or if it is time to throw in the towel. But seriously, excitement and adventure are all parts of a healthy relationship. To be honest, I don’t believe that any two people are ‘perfect’ for each other. Relationships are about team work, compromise, give and take, as well as getting along and being friends.

  7. 

    I think you are spot on that there is no such thing as the perfect man, or woman for that matter. We all have our faults and eccentricities. When you are in the lustful stage, you tend to be blind to those faults. Love, like life, is a journey. It has its ups and downs. My wife has put up with me for 27 years. The keys for us have been humor, friendship and talking through problems when they occur and they did and will for you. I wish for all to meet someone that can put up with your own set of baggage. I think that is what makes love endure. A little lust helps, too. Happy holidays, all, BTG

  8. 

    beautifully said my dear. i wake up with the same amazing man every day and love is this choice of each other…over and over again for fourteen years. and still worth the work it takes to intertwine two one of a kind people for a lifetime. xo

  9. 

    I’ve never liked the phrase “Hopeless romantic.” Then again, I’m an optimist. In my mind, there are few things that demonstrate hope better than love. Except maybe buying a lottery ticket 😉

  10. 

    Gorgeously written! Wow!

  11. 

    I enjoyed this read on love. It was a light, well worded jaunt along the trail of love. Good job on this. I do like how Kahlil Gibran express’s love from his book the prophet, Love chapter II.

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